Why is being single and celibate such a statement and why do I have to proclaim this?
I find myself having to make this distinction, more and more – especially to men and yes, particularly on dates. I can tell that sometimes this is an immediate deal-breaker and other times they will stick around for a while before they get-it that – Yes, I really am celibate.
Now, I’m no virgin nor am I saving myself for marriage. In fact, I love sex and I miss it terribly but I will not have sex unless I am certain that it’s going somewhere. One day – sex for the sake of sex – just wasn’t enough for me anymore. Sex is great and all, but it’s even better when you have it with someone who you truly care about. I hate that vicious cycle of sharing myself with someone, only to have it not work out. There’s just not enough room left in my heart for heartbreak.
There was once a time when ‘celibate’ literally meant that one was unmarried. But what about those like myself, who are not exactly sold on this idea of marriage – hell the only reason for getting married is to form a contract of security when you plan to have children (security and stability for the children of course). If I didn’t want children, I wouldn’t even contemplate the scary union.
Being content with my current status means that I won’t rush into any kind of relationship because I’m afraid of being alone. My last relationship was more than 3 years ago and I’m still in no hurry to start a new one – some of my friends think that this is strange.
So for the moment, it will take a hell of a man to charm his way into my pants 🙂